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新型育儿目标腾空出世：不逼孩子必须出人头地，新目标更接地气

发布日期：2024-07-30 13:36:10编辑：网络收集

前几天看到一个新闻，一位70岁的老人说：比起我的孩子有出息和能力，我宁愿他啃老。相信很多年轻家长对这句话肯定是不赞同的，因为大家都希望自己的孩子能出人头地，去争取更好的生活条件。但是随着孩子年龄的长大，逐渐开始有了自己的生活。尤其是工作以后很多都远离家乡，不能经常陪伴在父母身边，父母会非常的孤独。

隔壁邻居家王奶奶以前是一名人民教师，为人非常和善，而且教育的孩子也很棒。他的儿子和女儿学历都非常高，儿子在国外工作，女儿在北京上班。虽然工作都很好，但是离家都比较远，一年内回家的时间也就一两次而已。甚至有时候过年都回不来，而老奶奶的丈夫去年又去世了，现在只剩一个人在家非常孤独。孩子倒是有出息了，就是可怜了老人，没有孩子的陪伴，有些心酸。

今天我们就来聊一聊，如果孩子将来有出息了，父母年老之后会面对什么样的问题呢。

一、孩子有出息后，父母可能会面对什么样的生活？

1.亲子关系不合

有的家长为了让孩子有出息，可能会使用很多手段，激励孩子努力学习。甚至不惜和孩子发生矛盾，也要逼迫孩子好好学习。这可能会给孩子幼小的心灵留下阴影，孩子虽然按着家长的意思在努力学习，但是内心却与家长有了隔阂。努力学习也只是为了逃离家长，追寻自己想要的生活。以后想怎么做就可以怎么做，再也不用受家长的压迫。

2.非常孤单

当孩子有出息后，就有更大的能力获得好工作和生活，虽然这是很多家长最想要看到的事情，但是随之而来的也有很多现实的问题。当家长年老后，孩子不能陪在自己身边，看着别人家里一家人其乐融融，只能羡慕不已。如果自己的老伴还在的话还好，如果对象再去世了，那就真的只剩一个人了，平时连个说话的人都没有，一定非常孤单。

3.没有人照顾

如果说抚养孩子是家长的责任，那赡养老人也是孩子的义务。可是如果孩子出去后不能陪伴在老人身边，家里发生的很多事情他们其实是不了解的。如果老人突发疾病，有人发现后果会不堪设想。其次，老人养病也是需要比较长期的时间，孩子在外都有工作，谁又能一直照看老人呢。

二、为什么有些人会认为比起孩子有出息，更愿意他们啃老呢？

1.啃老也是一种陪伴

孩子从出生那天起，就与父母在逐渐分离。孩子从上学开始会离父母越来越远，孩子开始有了自己的朋友和生活，遇到父母的照顾也可以过得很好。可是父母却越来越舍不得孩子，当孩子上完大学参加工作时，更希望孩子能回到父母的身边。哪怕孩子啃老，对于父母来说也是一种陪伴，孩子能在自己身边就是最大的幸福。

2.可以适当照顾老人

随着父母一天天变老，他们的劳动能力也在下降，有很多事情自己已经完成不了了，需要子女的照顾和疼爱。家长辛辛苦苦把孩子拉扯大，等到了老年却没有人照顾，内心是非常孤独和脆弱的。每次能陪在父母身边，给予他们适当的关怀和照顾，父母就会感到非常满足了，这样的晚年生活才更有意义。而不是辛苦了一辈子，到头来还是自己一个人，那是每一个父母都感到非常心酸和痛苦的一件事。

3.只希望孩子平安健康就好

有出息有能力的孩子，以后所处的环境压力也是非常大的，需要有足够的承受能力才可以。毕竟生活中因为压力过大而出现身体疾病或自杀等的现象也不少，身为孩子的父母是非常痛苦和难过的。父母不求孩子有多大的出息，以后可以荣华富贵有很多钱财。他们最大的愿望就是孩子能在自己身边健健康康地长大，以后可以结婚生子，一家人幸福快乐生活在一起就足够了。

三、家长要想年老后孩子还能体贴自己，在孩子小时候该如何正确引导？

1.教育孩子学会感恩

养育孩子的过程并不容易，父母既要照顾孩子，还要兼顾家庭，是存在一定难度的。虽然大部分有了孩子之后变得更有责任，但是家长也不是万能的。生活中不能过分宠爱孩子，孩子有求必应，那样会把孩子惯坏，导致变得自私自利。要适当孩子知道家长的不容易，学会体谅家长，懂得感恩和回报。

2.以身作则，做孩子的榜样

有一则寓言故事讲的就是这个道理，一对夫妻带着孩子在餐桌前吃饭，给孩子的奶奶剩菜让她在一旁的小桌子上吃。这对夫妻偶然一次问孩子爱不爱父母时，结果孩子说了一句，当然爱了，等你们老了以后我也会让你们爱奶奶这样对你们的。这对夫妻一听羞愧不已，赶紧请老人上桌吃饭。简单的故事里蕴含着深刻的道理，父母是孩子最好的榜样，只有父母做到真正的孝敬，孩子后才会尊重和爱护父母。

3.不要对孩子一味地付出

自己对孩子好，孩子以后就一定会对父母孝敬么，答案并不是的。如果父母对孩子的付出没有底线，所有的事情都替孩子处理好，会导致孩子没有独立生活的能力。孩子也会理所当然地认为父母就应该帮他做所有的事情，如果一旦不顺着孩子的意思，他们还可能会发脾气，和父母产生矛盾，更不要指着他们以后能孝敬父母了。

父母把所有的心血都清除在自己的孩子身上，作为子女我们一定要懂得知恩图报。当父母年老后，多多陪伴和照顾他们，一家人在一起就是最大的幸福。

关于父母年老无人陪伴这件事，你是怎么看待的呢？欢迎在评论区留言与我们分享。

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