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亲子沟通的方法技巧与策略(3)

发布日期：2013-11-01 11:31:29编辑：Chen

后来，他特别宝贝，每看的时候总要说是圣诞爷爷送的礼物！我故意说：“是有人事先买好放的吧？”他坚决地说：“不是的！是圣诞爷爷给我送的！”

没有想到父母小小的伎俩，会给孩子带来这么巨大的欢乐，我们也和他一样高兴起来。原来，情人之间需要通过玫瑰传递一份浪漫，孩子和父母之间同样需要通过不存在的圣诞老人来传递爱。夜深了，儿子一反常态，静静地躺着，眸子熠熠闪光，默默地遥想着什么，我知道，他小小的心正在想着他新交的朋友、那个神通广大、善解人意的圣诞老人。

这是欺骗吗？也许对大人而言是这样，但孩子心中的“真实”，也许正是这些我们认为不可能发生的“神话”。

丹麦儿童文学大师安徒生有一次陪着邻居家的小女孩玩耍。他告诉那个小女孩，小精灵常常在草地的蘑菇下藏着宝贝。小女孩好奇地掀开草地上的小蘑菇查看。呀！在这里他发现了一个小玩具，小女孩惊喜万分。当然这些东西，都是安徒生事先藏在那里的。

当时和他们在一起的还有一位牧师。小女孩回家后，牧师生气地说：“你这是欺骗！”她总有一天会发现这些都是假的，她会感到痛苦的！”

“不，你不明白的。”安徒生回答：“她当然会发现这些不可能在现实生活中发生。但我为她做的这一切，将使她葆有一颗生机勃勃、充溢着美和神奇的心灵。”

延伸孩子的心情

一切语言刺激最好都带有孩子喜欢的趣味性；而在一切孩子所喜欢的活动中，都不要忘了进行不要而有效的语言交流。

爱玩，爱做游戏，这是孩子们的天性。游戏的娱乐性和趣味性，能使孩子情绪愉快，兴高采烈。而这种作用对于孩子的生理和心理的健康发展，是大有好处的，而且是对孩子进行教育的最好方式。

聪明的父母和教师应当努力把与孩子的交流变成游戏，应当做到：一切语言刺激最好都带有孩子喜欢的趣味性；而在一切孩子所喜欢的活动中，都不要忘了进行必要而有效的语言交流。

如；孩子拿着一根棍当马骑，并用小树枝或小布条当作马鞭抽打着，孩子玩得很高兴，可是当他玩够了的时候，就会仍下木棍跑去玩别的了。这样的游戏反映了什么呢！只是表现了孩子把木棍当马骑这一天真的天性。父母对孩子这样游戏往往是听之任之、不加理会，有时说话也只是说：“把棍子放到原来的地方，别到处乱扔！”如此而已。

其实，这种情况正是父母与孩子进行语言交流的大好时机。譬如，妈妈可以提来小桶对孩子说：“看，马跑了半天，一定累坏了，让它喝点水吃些草吧。”那么，孩子就会很高兴地接过小桶给马“喝水”，还会自言自语地说：“我的小马儿，你喝饱了吗！

现在我牵你到马棚里喂草吧┄┄”孩子玩完“骑马”的游戏，再也不会把木棍一扔了事，而是对“马”关怀备至。既发展了语言和想象的能力，又培养了良好的品格和习惯。而这一切都事轻松愉快的玩耍中进行的。父母与孩子在游戏中沟通，既可以收到良好的教育效果，又能拉近亲子间的距离，创造美好的沟通氛围。

如：儿子三岁多的时候，有一天在床上舞起了被单儿，累的红扑扑的脸儿上渗出一层细细的汗珠。他刚刚在电视上看过“海之魂”舞蹈表演，自己也要当一回舞蹈演员。我的眼睛被儿子掀起的天真的浪花溅湿了，情不自禁地赞叹说：“多美的舞蹈啊，大海的儿子！”儿子一下子惊住了，仿佛自己真的走进了童话的世界，不得不提出现实的疑问：“啊，你是大海！”我严肃地摇摇头说：“不，我们都是大海的孩子。”儿子拍手欢呼，指着我的鼻子说：“你成了小孩儿了！”说完，浪花又在他的小手里欢跳起来。

多么美好的亲子沟通！父母只要有心，就一定能在孩子各式各样的游戏中找到交流的最佳契机。

说话中多用形象、类比的方法

父母的语言，可能是具体生动、敏锐有力的。也可能是空洞、愚钝的、干巴、软弱的。父母只有使用具体形象的话语，进行生动类比，才便于孩子接受和理解，才能打开通往孩子心灵的道路，也才能富有趣味，让孩子感受真正的快乐。

六岁大的儿子坐在父亲的汽车里，问“为什么前面那辆汽车会冒烟？”父亲答：“儿子会吃饭、喝水，而运动以后，不要的东西就变成”尿”和“便”，排泄出来。车子也一样，吃进去汽油就像你吃了饭一样，才有力气跑；发动了车子，汽油使用后会变成黑烟，从车后排除来，就仿佛车子在“尿尿”一样。所以要把窗子关上，才不会吸到臭味。”这是将车比喻成“人”的答法，是问题回答的很形象，也能使小孩很容易了解。

如果父母是从汽车的原理等理论去阐述，那么，会使孩子感到枯燥乏味，并且难以理解。生活中，孩子会经常冒才许许多多的“为什么”，父母可以根据孩子不同的年龄不同的理解力运用不同的类比方式去说。父母多用形象的比喻会使自己的语言更具有吸引力和艺术性，孩子在快乐交流的同时，也会吸收父母的语言艺术和精华。

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