妈妈育儿网

主页 > 教育 > 行为教育 >

再难 也要陪孩子度过这段时间

发布日期：2025-01-17 12:57:15编辑：秩名

再难 也要陪孩子度过这段时间
 
　　孩子出生第一年，家里老人经常劝我：“城里的生活压力那么大，不如把孩子送回老家给我们带吧!趁我们还有力气，帮你带几年，你好专心做你的工作，打拼你的事业……”
 
　　说我从来没有动摇过，这是假的!毕竟在房价物价都在飞涨的城市里生活，每个人都有很大的压力!
 
　　但是，“把孩子送回老家”这个念头出现在我脑海没多久，就被我打消了。（关注微信订阅号：朵妈亲子时光，聊聊亲子育儿那些事）
 
 
　　我问了自己三个问题：
 
　　1、如果不陪伴在孩子身边，哪天她见到我，会觉得我很陌生吗?
 
　　2、如果不陪伴在孩子身边，她开口叫的第一个人不是“妈妈”，我会难过吗?
 
　　3、如果不陪伴在孩子的身边，我不知道她在慢慢长大，不知道她在学爬、学走，没有看到她迈出人生的第一步，我会后悔吗?
 
　　一个坚定的声音告诉我：会!
 
　　于是就算有再多的困难，我也选择把孩子带在自己的身边!就算我不能给孩子提供那么优渥的生活、每个月我的花销会更多、下班后我会忙成陀螺、累成狗……但我也不会后悔!因为——
 
　　1、孩子3岁前，父母的陪伴太重要了!
 
　　心理学家哈洛曾经做过一个非常著名的“母爱剥夺实验”：
 
　　实验的初步研究
 
　　研究者把刚出生不久的小猴放进了一个笼子中养育，并且用两个假猴子来代替猴子的妈妈：
 
　　一个“猴子妈妈”由铁丝缠绕而成，触觉冰冷，但是它的胸前安置了一个可以提供奶水的奶头，只要小猴饿了，就能从中吸出奶水;
 
　　另一个“猴子妈妈”由绒布做成，笑容可掬，有着柔软而温暖的怀抱。但可惜的是它的乳房里吸不到奶，没法给小猴们提供任何的食物。
 
　　按照“有奶便是娘”的说法，大家都会以为小猴们会更喜欢第一个“猴子妈妈”。然而研究者发现，只有饿的时候，小猴们才去找“铁丝妈妈”，其余大部分时间都依偎在“绒布妈妈”的怀里，紧紧抱住它，似乎“绒布妈妈”会给小猴们带来更多的安全感。
 
　　实验的后续
 
　　但是，毕竟这个“绒布妈妈”仅仅是触觉柔软、笑容温暖，它并不是真正意义上的妈妈，无法给婴儿时期的小猴带来真正的母爱。
 
　　后来，研究者把长大了的猴子们放回到猴群中，发现这些从小缺乏母爱的猴子，基本上都表现出冷漠孤僻、不合群等各种心理问题，甚至发情期也不会懂交配或拒绝交配。即使人工受孕生下了小猴，它们也会残忍地虐待自己的孩子、或直接咬死。
 
　　哈洛的这个实验有点残忍，但是给了人类很多启示，并颠覆了传统的育儿观念。在此之前，人们并没有深刻地认识到父母的陪伴，对一个孩子的成长有多重要。大家都以为养育孩子，只要保证孩子能“吃饱穿暖”就足够了。
 
　　但是实验结果告诉我们，一个有智力有情感的生命，会本能地渴求父母的肌肤之亲、温暖的怀抱、慈爱的眼神以及轻柔的话语。这些因素，都是保证孩子健康成长不可或缺的因素。孩子能从父母的陪伴中得到充足的安全感和愉快的情感体验，这是孩子拥有健康人格的基础。
 
　　否则，等到孩子长大了，再想来弥补ta内心的空缺，这时已经迟了!
 
 
　　2、爱孩子，就要舍得在孩子身上花时间
 
　　十月怀胎生下孩子，如果没有给予孩子亲密的陪伴，我们也只是孩子生理上的妈妈，而不是心理上的妈妈，因为：
 
　　母子情深，是在一次次喂奶哄睡换尿布中建立起来的;
 
　　亲密关系，是在一天天的游戏玩耍陪伴中发展起来的;
 
　　安全感，是在长年累月无休止的关爱中累积起来的……
 
　　也许我们曾经有过一个这样的疑虑：“你说为什么，我们的孩子会这样黏妈妈呢?”
 
　　还不是因为你从孩子的生命之初开始，就毫无怨言地陪伴在ta身边，甘之如饴、不求回报地满足ta的一切需求?
 
　　3、最重要的3年，做最重要的事!
 
　　诚然，没有哪个父母是不爱孩子的。
 
　　有些爸爸妈妈不得不和宝贝分开，也只是想趁自己年轻，多拼一点，让孩子接下来有更好的生活。
 
　　但是，我们很可能搞错了什么才是对孩子更重要的。我们以为，爱孩子，就要让他住更好的房子、上更好的学校、穿更好的衣服鞋子……
 
　　不!这些我们看得见摸得着的东西，在孩子眼里只是浮云。反而看不见、摸不着的爱和关注，才是孩子真真切切需要的!
 
　　扪心自问，我们为老板卖命打工或者自己拼死拼活地创业，三年后就能过上我们想要的生活了吗?
 
　　很大程度上，并不能!飞涨的房价物价，只会让3年后的我们更加望尘莫及。
 
　　然而，把握好对孩子成长至关重要的这3年，给予ta最真切的陪伴，这才是最有价值的3年!否则，错过了孩子成长的关键期，甚至让孩子的身心发展出现问题，这才是最让我们追悔莫及的。
 
　　还是那句老话，珍惜孩子最需要你的时光吧!再不陪陪ta，ta就长大了!（关注微信订阅号：朵妈亲子时光，聊聊亲子育儿那些事）
 
　　而那些每天都陪伴着孩子的妈妈，朵妈想给你们竖起大拇指，带好自己的娃，的确是一件再平凡不过的事了，然而这真是一件很伟大的事!

猜你喜欢

编辑推荐

热门阅读

Weibo Article 1 Weibo Article 2 Weibo Article 3 Weibo Article 4 Weibo Article 5 Weibo Article 6 Weibo Article 7 Weibo Article 8 Weibo Article 9 Weibo Article 10 Weibo Article 11 Weibo Article 12 Weibo Article 13 Weibo Article 14 Weibo Article 15 Weibo Article 16 Weibo Article 17 Weibo Article 18 Weibo Article 19 Weibo Article 20 Weibo Article 21 Weibo Article 22 Weibo Article 23 Weibo Article 24 Weibo Article 25 Weibo Article 26 Weibo Article 27 Weibo Article 28 Weibo Article 29 Weibo Article 30 Weibo Article 31 Weibo Article 32 Weibo Article 33 Weibo Article 34 Weibo Article 35 Weibo Article 36 Weibo Article 37 Weibo Article 38 Weibo Article 39 Weibo Article 40 Weibo Article 41 Weibo Article 42 Weibo Article 43 Weibo Article 44 Weibo Article 45 Weibo Article 46 Weibo Article 47 Weibo Article 48 Weibo Article 49 Weibo Article 50 Weibo Article 51 Weibo Article 52 Weibo Article 53 Weibo Article 54 Weibo Article 55 Weibo Article 56 Weibo Article 57 Weibo Article 58 Weibo Article 59 Weibo Article 60 Weibo Article 61 Weibo Article 62 Weibo Article 63 Weibo Article 64 Weibo Article 65 Weibo Article 66 Weibo Article 67 Weibo Article 68 Weibo Article 69 Weibo Article 70 Weibo Article 71 Weibo Article 72 Weibo Article 73 Weibo Article 74 Weibo Article 75 Weibo Article 76 Weibo Article 77 Weibo Article 78 Weibo Article 79 Weibo Article 80 Weibo Article 81 Weibo Article 82 Weibo Article 83 Weibo Article 84 Weibo Article 85 Weibo Article 86 Weibo Article 87 Weibo Article 88 Weibo Article 89 Weibo Article 90 Weibo Article 91 Weibo Article 92 Weibo Article 93 Weibo Article 94 Weibo Article 95 Weibo Article 96 Weibo Article 97 Weibo Article 98 Weibo Article 99 Weibo Article 100 Weibo Article 101 Weibo Article 102 Weibo Article 103 Weibo Article 104 Weibo Article 105 Weibo Article 106 Weibo Article 107 Weibo Article 108 Weibo Article 109 Weibo Article 110 Weibo Article 111 Weibo Article 112 Weibo Article 113 Weibo Article 114 Weibo Article 115 Weibo Article 116 Weibo Article 117 Weibo Article 118 Weibo Article 119 Weibo Article 120 Weibo Article 121 Weibo Article 122 Weibo Article 123 Weibo Article 124 Weibo Article 125 Weibo Article 126 Weibo Article 127 Weibo Article 128 Weibo Article 129 Weibo Article 130 Weibo Article 131 Weibo Article 132 Weibo Article 133 Weibo Article 134 Weibo Article 135 Weibo Article 136 Weibo Article 137 Weibo Article 138 Weibo Article 139 Weibo Article 140 Weibo Article 141 Weibo Article 142 Weibo Article 143 Weibo Article 144 Weibo Article 145 Weibo Article 146 Weibo Article 147 Weibo Article 148 Weibo Article 149 Weibo Article 150 Weibo Article 151 Weibo Article 152 Weibo Article 153 Weibo Article 154 Weibo Article 155 Weibo Article 156 Weibo Article 157 Weibo Article 158 Weibo Article 159 Weibo Article 160 Weibo Article 161 Weibo Article 162 Weibo Article 163 Weibo Article 164 Weibo Article 165 Weibo Article 166 Weibo Article 167 Weibo Article 168 Weibo Article 169 Weibo Article 170 Weibo Article 171 Weibo Article 172 Weibo Article 173 Weibo Article 174 Weibo Article 175 Weibo Article 176 Weibo Article 177 Weibo Article 178 Weibo Article 179 Weibo Article 180 Weibo Article 181 Weibo Article 182 Weibo Article 183 Weibo Article 184 Weibo Article 185 Weibo Article 186 Weibo Article 187 Weibo Article 188 Weibo Article 189 Weibo Article 190 Weibo Article 191 Weibo Article 192 Weibo Article 193 Weibo Article 194 Weibo Article 195 Weibo Article 196 Weibo Article 197 Weibo Article 198 Weibo Article 199 Weibo Article 200 Weibo Article 201 Weibo Article 202 Weibo Article 203 Weibo Article 204 Weibo Article 205 Weibo Article 206 Weibo Article 207 Weibo Article 208 Weibo Article 209 Weibo Article 210 Weibo Article 211 Weibo Article 212 Weibo Article 213 Weibo Article 214 Weibo Article 215 Weibo Article 216 Weibo Article 217 Weibo Article 218 Weibo Article 219 Weibo Article 220 Weibo Article 221 Weibo Article 222 Weibo Article 223 Weibo Article 224 Weibo Article 225 Weibo Article 226 Weibo Article 227 Weibo Article 228 Weibo Article 229 Weibo Article 230 Weibo Article 231 Weibo Article 232 Weibo Article 233 Weibo Article 234 Weibo Article 235 Weibo Article 236 Weibo Article 237 Weibo Article 238 Weibo Article 239 Weibo Article 240 Weibo Article 241 Weibo Article 242 Weibo Article 243 Weibo Article 244 Weibo Article 245 Weibo Article 246 Weibo Article 247 Weibo Article 248 Weibo Article 249 Weibo Article 250 Weibo Article 251 Weibo Article 252 Weibo Article 253 Weibo Article 254 Weibo Article 255 Weibo Article 256 Weibo Article 257 Weibo Article 258 Weibo Article 259 Weibo Article 260 Weibo Article 261 Weibo Article 262 Weibo Article 263 Weibo Article 264 Weibo Article 265 Weibo Article 266 Weibo Article 267 Weibo Article 268 Weibo Article 269 Weibo Article 270 Weibo Article 271 Weibo Article 272 Weibo Article 273 Weibo Article 274 Weibo Article 275 Weibo Article 276 Weibo Article 277 Weibo Article 278 Weibo Article 279 Weibo Article 280 Weibo Article 281 Weibo Article 282 Weibo Article 283 Weibo Article 284 Weibo Article 285 Weibo Article 286 Weibo Article 287 Weibo Article 288 Weibo Article 289 Weibo Article 290 Weibo Article 291 Weibo Article 292 Weibo Article 293 Weibo Article 294 Weibo Article 295 Weibo Article 296 Weibo Article 297 Weibo Article 298 Weibo Article 299 Weibo Article 300 Weibo Article 301 Weibo Article 302 Weibo Article 303 Weibo Article 304 Weibo Article 305 Weibo Article 306 Weibo Article 307 Weibo Article 308 Weibo Article 309 Weibo Article 310 Weibo Article 311 Weibo Article 312 Weibo Article 313 Weibo Article 314 Weibo Article 315 Weibo Article 316 Weibo Article 317 Weibo Article 318 Weibo Article 319 Weibo Article 320 Weibo Article 321 Weibo Article 322 Weibo Article 323 Weibo Article 324 Weibo Article 325 Weibo Article 326 Weibo Article 327 Weibo Article 328 Weibo Article 329 Weibo Article 330 Weibo Article 331 Weibo Article 332 Weibo Article 333 Weibo Article 334 Weibo Article 335 Weibo Article 336 Weibo Article 337 Weibo Article 338 Weibo Article 339 Weibo Article 340 Weibo Article 341 Weibo Article 342 Weibo Article 343 Weibo Article 344 Weibo Article 345 Weibo Article 346 Weibo Article 347 Weibo Article 348 Weibo Article 349 Weibo Article 350 Weibo Article 351 Weibo Article 352 Weibo Article 353 Weibo Article 354 Weibo Article 355 Weibo Article 356 Weibo Article 357 Weibo Article 358 Weibo Article 359 Weibo Article 360 Weibo Article 361 Weibo Article 362 Weibo Article 363 Weibo Article 364 Weibo Article 365 Weibo Article 366 Weibo Article 367 Weibo Article 368 Weibo Article 369 Weibo Article 370 Weibo Article 371 Weibo Article 372 Weibo Article 373 Weibo Article 374 Weibo Article 375 Weibo Article 376 Weibo Article 377 Weibo Article 378 Weibo Article 379 Weibo Article 380 Weibo Article 381 Weibo Article 382 Weibo Article 383 Weibo Article 384 Weibo Article 385 Weibo Article 386 Weibo Article 387 Weibo Article 388 Weibo Article 389 Weibo Article 390 Weibo Article 391 Weibo Article 392 Weibo Article 393 Weibo Article 394 Weibo Article 395 Weibo Article 396 Weibo Article 397 Weibo Article 398 Weibo Article 399 Weibo Article 400 Weibo Article 401 Weibo Article 402 Weibo Article 403 Weibo Article 404 Weibo Article 405 Weibo Article 406 Weibo Article 407 Weibo Article 408 Weibo Article 409 Weibo Article 410 Weibo Article 411 Weibo Article 412 Weibo Article 413 Weibo Article 414 Weibo Article 415 Weibo Article 416 Weibo Article 417 Weibo Article 418 Weibo Article 419 Weibo Article 420 Weibo Article 421 Weibo Article 422 Weibo Article 423 Weibo Article 424 Weibo Article 425 Weibo Article 426 Weibo Article 427 Weibo Article 428 Weibo Article 429 Weibo Article 430 Weibo Article 431 Weibo Article 432 Weibo Article 433 Weibo Article 434 Weibo Article 435 Weibo Article 436 Weibo Article 437 Weibo Article 438 Weibo Article 439 Weibo Article 440 Weibo Article 441 Weibo Article 442 Weibo Article 443 Weibo Article 444 Weibo Article 445 Weibo Article 446 Weibo Article 447 Weibo Article 448 Weibo Article 449 Weibo Article 450 Weibo Article 451 Weibo Article 452 Weibo Article 453 Weibo Article 454 Weibo Article 455 Weibo Article 456 Weibo Article 457 Weibo Article 458 Weibo Article 459 Weibo Article 460 Weibo Article 461 Weibo Article 462 Weibo Article 463 Weibo Article 464 Weibo Article 465 Weibo Article 466 Weibo Article 467 Weibo Article 468 Weibo Article 469 Weibo Article 470 Weibo Article 471 Weibo Article 472 Weibo Article 473 Weibo Article 474 Weibo Article 475 Weibo Article 476 Weibo Article 477 Weibo Article 478 Weibo Article 479 Weibo Article 480 Weibo Article 481 Weibo Article 482 Weibo Article 483 Weibo Article 484 Weibo Article 485 Weibo Article 486 Weibo Article 487 Weibo Article 488 Weibo Article 489 Weibo Article 490 Weibo Article 491 Weibo Article 492 Weibo Article 493 Weibo Article 494 Weibo Article 495 Weibo Article 496 Weibo Article 497 Weibo Article 498 Weibo Article 499 Weibo Article 500 Weibo Article 501 Weibo Article 502 Weibo Article 503 Weibo Article 504 Weibo Article 505 Weibo Article 506 Weibo Article 507 Weibo Article 508 Weibo Article 509 Weibo Article 510 Weibo Article 511 Weibo Article 512 Weibo Article 513 Weibo Article 514 Weibo Article 515 Weibo Article 516 Weibo Article 517 Weibo Article 518 Weibo Article 519 Weibo Article 520 Weibo Article 521 Weibo Article 522 Weibo Article 523 Weibo Article 524 Weibo Article 525 Weibo Article 526 Weibo Article 527 Weibo Article 528 Weibo Article 529 Weibo Article 530 Weibo Article 531 Weibo Article 532 Weibo Article 533 Weibo Article 534 Weibo Article 535 Weibo Article 536 Weibo Article 537 Weibo Article 538 Weibo Article 539 Weibo Article 540 Weibo Article 541 Weibo Article 542 Weibo Article 543 Weibo Article 544 Weibo Article 545 Weibo Article 546 Weibo Article 547 Weibo Article 548 Weibo Article 549 Weibo Article 550 Weibo Article 551 Weibo Article 552 Weibo Article 553 Weibo Article 554 Weibo Article 555 Weibo Article 556 Weibo Article 557 Weibo Article 558 Weibo Article 559 Weibo Article 560 Weibo Article 561 Weibo Article 562 Weibo Article 563 Weibo Article 564 Weibo Article 565 Weibo Article 566 Weibo Article 567 Weibo Article 568 Weibo Article 569 Weibo Article 570 Weibo Article 571 Weibo Article 572 Weibo Article 573 Weibo Article 574 Weibo Article 575 Weibo Article 576 Weibo Article 577 Weibo Article 578 Weibo Article 579 Weibo Article 580 Weibo Article 581 Weibo Article 582 Weibo Article 583 Weibo Article 584 Weibo Article 585 Weibo Article 586 Weibo Article 587 Weibo Article 588 Weibo Article 589 Weibo Article 590 Weibo Article 591 Weibo Article 592 Weibo Article 593 Weibo Article 594 Weibo Article 595 Weibo Article 596 Weibo Article 597 Weibo Article 598 Weibo Article 599 Weibo Article 600 Weibo Article 601 Weibo Article 602 Weibo Article 603 Weibo Article 604 Weibo Article 605 Weibo Article 606 Weibo Article 607 Weibo Article 608 Weibo Article 609 Weibo Article 610 Weibo Article 611 Weibo Article 612 Weibo Article 613 Weibo Article 614 Weibo Article 615 Weibo Article 616 Weibo Article 617 Weibo Article 618 Weibo Article 619 Weibo Article 620 Weibo Article 621 Weibo Article 622 Weibo Article 623 Weibo Article 624 Weibo Article 625 Weibo Article 626 Weibo Article 627 Weibo Article 628 Weibo Article 629 Weibo Article 630 Weibo Article 631 Weibo Article 632 Weibo Article 633 Weibo Article 634 Weibo Article 635 Weibo Article 636 Weibo Article 637 Weibo Article 638 Weibo Article 639 Weibo Article 640 Weibo Article 641 Weibo Article 642 Weibo Article 643 Weibo Article 644 Weibo Article 645 Weibo Article 646 Weibo Article 647 Weibo Article 648 Weibo Article 649 Weibo Article 650 Weibo Article 651 Weibo Article 652 Weibo Article 653 Weibo Article 654 Weibo Article 655 Weibo Article 656 Weibo Article 657 Weibo Article 658 Weibo Article 659 Weibo Article 660 Weibo Article 661 Weibo Article 662 Weibo Article 663 Weibo Article 664 Weibo Article 665 Weibo Article 666 Weibo Article 667 Weibo Article 668 Weibo Article 669 Weibo Article 670 Weibo Article 671 Weibo Article 672 Weibo Article 673 Weibo Article 674 Weibo Article 675 Weibo Article 676 Weibo Article 677 Weibo Article 678 Weibo Article 679 Weibo Article 680 Weibo Article 681 Weibo Article 682 Weibo Article 683 Weibo Article 684 Weibo Article 685 Weibo Article 686 Weibo Article 687 Weibo Article 688 Weibo Article 689 Weibo Article 690 Weibo Article 691 Weibo Article 692 Weibo Article 693 Weibo Article 694 Weibo Article 695 Weibo Article 696 Weibo Article 697 Weibo Article 698 Weibo Article 699 Weibo Article 700 Weibo Article 701 Weibo Article 702 Weibo Article 703 Weibo Article 704 Weibo Article 705 Weibo Article 706 Weibo Article 707 Weibo Article 708 Weibo Article 709 Weibo Article 710 Weibo Article 711 Weibo Article 712 Weibo Article 713 Weibo Article 714 Weibo Article 715 Weibo Article 716 Weibo Article 717 Weibo Article 718 Weibo Article 719 Weibo Article 720 Weibo Article 721 Weibo Article 722 Weibo Article 723 Weibo Article 724 Weibo Article 725 Weibo Article 726