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孩子没带好 别让老人替你背锅

发布日期：2025-01-21 11:04:13编辑：秩名

孩子没带好 别让老人替你背锅
 
　　“穿怎么多，孩子不生病才怪!”
 
　　“不要给孩子吃太多糖，对牙齿不好!”
 
　　“你这样有求必应，孩子都要被你宠坏了!”
 
　　……
 
　　这些话是不是很熟悉，没错，这些都是我们常对家里老人说的话，说出口的时候不觉得有什么，但是仔细想想，每一句话里都充斥着我们对老人带孩子的挑剔与抱怨。
 
 
　　孩子没带好，难道真的都是老人的错吗？
 
　　回答这个问题前，先问问自己：
 
　　我们有抱怨老人的资格吗？
 
　　随着时代的发展进步，我们有机会接受更好的教育、懂得使用更先进的设备去获取最新的育儿资讯，这使得我们自以为比老人更懂得带孩子，从而对他们的育儿方式产生抱怨。
 
　　☆ 孩子感冒发烧，老人说不要太紧张，我们立即反驳说：“生病当然第一时间看医生!”
 
　　☆ 孩子吵着要吃糖，老人心软给孩子糖吃，我们会抱怨道：“为什么总是给他糖吃!”
 
　　☆ 带孩子出门，老人抱起孩子就要走，我们立刻阻止说：“现在都是用推车!”
 
　　其实，大多数老人比我们带孩子更有经验，只是他们的方法有些落后而已，这不能怪他们。就连我们自己现在用的方法对于下一代来说可能都是落后的，那么，我们又有什么资格去抱怨老人的呢?
 
　　带孩子是父母的责任
 
　　孩子是父母的，带孩子自然也是父母的责任，老人完全没有义务帮忙，也许我们都该好好反省：
 
　　* 孩子受凉感冒，老人心疼，就会想要给孩子多穿，这个时候我们在干嘛?
 
　　* 孩子哭闹，老人心一软，就会忍不住给孩子糖吃，这个时候我们在干嘛?
 
　　* 孩子想要这个想要那个，老人疼爱孙子自然毫不犹豫掏腰包，这个时候我们又在干嘛?
 
　　通常，我们都会说：“我在上班挣钱养家啊。”
 
　　这个理由充分到让人无法反驳。的确，没有足够的经济收入又怎能支撑起一个家、为家人提供优裕的生活条件呢?
 
　　可是，我们也必须承认，从选择“上班挣钱养家”的那一刻起，我们就失去了很多跟孩子相处的时光，也无法兼顾到孩子的教育。所以孩子没带好，我们自己首先要负最大的责任，而不是老人。
 
　　老人只是给了孩子另一种爱
 
　　我们常说是老人把孩子给惯坏了，其实不然，老人可能会宠溺孩子，却没有惯坏孩子，他们只是给了孩子另一种爱。
 
　　当我们因为工作缺席了孩子的成长而感到愧疚时，是老人们的爱让我们稍微好过些。
 
　　我们不在孩子身边时，他们至少还有爷爷奶奶或外公外婆的爱，这种爱虽不能代替父母的爱，但也能给孩子的童年留下很多美好温馨的回忆。
 
　　因此，在带孩子方面，老人的宠溺是单纯爱孩子，出现孩子被惯坏的情况，只能说是我们自己的失败，没有教育和引导好孩子，这个锅不应该由老人来背。
 
　　少点抱怨 多些感恩
 
　　老人辛苦了大半辈子，晚年就该享享清福。于是，我们便把孩子交给老人带，觉得天伦之乐也是一种清福。
 
　　然而，老人理解的享清福可能是：早上到公园下棋耍太极、下午约上几个好友去叹下午茶、晚上兴致来了就去跳跳广场舞、玩闷了就来个夕阳红组团游……
 
　　现实中的享清福却是：早上送孙子上学，下午接孙子放学，晚上没人陪聊天早早睡觉，想参加组团游却因儿女们的反对而作罢……
 
　　面对老人们所做的一切，我们不仅视而不见，反而一边抱怨他们带孩子不靠谱，还一边告诉他们下次应该怎么做，瞬间感觉自己的良心在隐隐作痛。
 
　　带孩子从来不是一件轻松的事，老人之所以意揽下这个苦差，完全是出于对子女和儿孙的爱，我们要心怀感激。
 
　　如果老人的某些做法确实会伤害到孩子，应该心平气和地和老人沟通，用事实例子告诉他们这样做的严重性，而不是一味去抱怨和指责他们。
 
　　孩子最终出现这样或那样的问题，我们作为父母的要负主要责任，毕竟自己的孩子自己不去管教，又怎能去怪责别人呢?
 

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